Some day in June this year, I received the diagnosis dysthymia. I thought, wow, finally I get a name for my disease, not only depression (which is somehow like saying meat when you mean spare ribs). I waited since October 2015 for a clear diagnosis. Googling dysthymia was like receiving a punch in the face. Dysthymia means ‘chronical depression’. I was shocked and I’m still shocked. First because I thought ‘how long do I carry this sickness in me?’. And on the other hand ‘chronical’ means forever, so I will never ever be healthy again.

At the moment, my biggest problems are fatigue and sadness. To work together with a therapist on your own mind is very stressful. Like in the picture above, my head and my mind are a construction site, somehow, the sun is shinig and everything is alright, few moments later, there is a thunderstorm which makes…